“It isn’t Jesus, it’s just some fella.” Charlie Bostock

Jesus Pan

I hope Breville and George Foreman have seen an opportunity to diversify.

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The Guardian has one of those terribly interesting (well I think so) slightly off-the-rail economic indicator articles for dummies. It mentions quite a few different things, but this bit caught my eye in particular:

Yesterday the price of copper hit an all-time record of $8,000 a tonne, driven by frantic buying and selling by commodity brokers and futures traders. But a little-noticed fact is that every 2p piece made before 1992 is 97% copper - meaning that each coin contains 6.9g of the metal. Collect together 145 of them, and you’ve got a kilo’s worth of copper. Now, just find another 999kg, a total of 145,000 coins, and you’ve got a tonne.

On their face value, those coins are worth just £2,900. But taking them to a scrap merchant and selling them on the open market for their metal content will make you a cool £1,500 profit, especially if you throw in the 25kg of zinc that are also sitting in your goldmine of loose change.

Now this got me thinking about all those 4.5 ltr Bell’s bottles of whisky and how many full ones you’d need to get yourself a tonne of two pence pieces.

The Royal Mint has the following info regarding the coin:

Dia 25.9mm
Weight 7.12grms
Thickness 1.85mm - bronze
2.03mm - copper-plated steel

I’ve scoured the internet for answers as to how many 2ps you can fit in a 4.5 ltr whisky bottle but all to no avail. I’ve also spent the last hour trying to convert crap into other crap - also to no avail. It appears that my maths o-level isn’t really of any use; although, I have converted fishcakes into hectares.

So the question is: How do you work it out?

(Please ;-))

Maybe your elephants haven’t survived the cold spell or perhaps you didn’t complete your whittler’s badge at Scouts. None of that matters anymore as you can now make your own DIY chess set out of old (or new) nuts and bolts.

It really is a doddle. Find out how here.

Matthew 24:29-34
[T]he sun will be darkened, and the moon will not give its light; the stars will fall from the sky, and the heavenly bodies will be shaken. . . . They will see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of the sky, with power and great glory. . . . I tell you the truth, this generation will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened.

Woody 24:13-30
And you shall know the time of his coming, for he shall be seen in all manner of dubious ebay scams.

You find an oil stain on a sheetmetal sheet and, even though it bears more of a passing resemblance to Rocky after he’d just had seven bells of poop knocked out of him, you claim it’s Jesus then flog it on ebay for a mere $1,575.00

As Thomas Haley, the guy who found the sheet in the hardware store that he works at says, “I feel kind of bad just pawning off Christ.”

Hmmmmm, I wonder if he feels any worse now it’s been sold or that it didn’t quite make its buy-it-now price of $10,000.

Anyway, if you just so happen to be one of those goons that like to find the image of Christ in anything from a cheeseburger to a pus-filled goiter, and would love to spend over a grand on very own lump of sheet metal with some bizarre stain on it that you believe is Jesus, please don’t hesitate to get in touch.

We can churn these buggers out ten a penny.

We can also do Allah, Vishnu, Buddha, most Disney characters and every American president bar Gerald Ford.

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As cheered as I am about K-9 returning as one of Dr Who’s sidekicks for the next series, I have to ask how something built in the year 5000 has managed to go rusty. (Even if he has spent the last 20-odd years stuck here on Earth.)

K-9 then….

K-9 now

Yes, it takes a special kind of pedant to point this kind of thing out, but do we really think that DIY robot dog makers will be using mild steel 3,000 years hence?

In a way it’d be nice to think they might.

I wonder if they debate similar dilemmas over at The Dalek Builders’ Guild.