“Time flies by when I’m the driver of a train
And I ride on the footplate there and back again”
Chigley

It doesn’t seem too long since I spoke to John. In fact, I tapped him up for a reference if memory serves me right. And he obviously supplied me with something half decent…..bless him.

Anyway, that’s not much longer than a month ago and in that time he’s taken a new lad on, who I have no idea about other than he’s worked previously in aerospace. I wouldn’t mind apart from the fact he mentioned how quiet they were and he was taking a bit of time off.

Well, since then, according to my dear old ma, he’s done nothing but work until 8 every evening and most weekends as well - he’s such a martyr. But, he’s had no way of getting in touch as we’ve only just got a phone sorted.

But, there shall be more of an update once I’ve been given an update.

He also must be making a bit of a mint as he’s finally forked out for a big plasma telly, although I sincerely hope he hasn’t let Matt attach it to his wall. At least I can still get my HD fix over Christmas when I visit.

And he’s managed to claim third place in the Trawden Scarecrow competition, which is a far better effort than coming first in their planter competition a couple of years ago. Every villager and his useful idiot makes a scarecrow and sticks it in their garden for visitors to gawp at. According to the visit Lancashire site you can buy tickets for a mere £5 - including bus fare, of course. Apparently he finished off the kids’ Dennis the Menace scarecrow with a couple of stainless steel tubular arms that could actually be used as a big catapult. I’m sure my two nephews made some form of use of that particular feature. Worzel Gummidge could’ve been a straw transformer if he could utilise catapult arms as well as exchangeable bonces.

But if you think £5 is a bit steep just to wander around some village looking at scarecrows, then I have no idea what to think about paying through both nostrils so that he and my sister could go and see Barbara Streisand in Manchester. (When I say see I’m to referring to in concert as opposed to going round for a cup of tea at her Fallowfield pad.)

But seriously, BARBARA STREISAND?

I’m not surprised he hasn’t rung me for a while.