John emailed me last night to tell me one or two things, but also that the first day back since the Christmas break had seen the planter hotline enter meltdown.

Apparently we were receiving calls at the rate of one every five minutes. It was a Planters Direct record – talk about meeting your targets.

However, everytime somebody answered the phone, it remained strangely silent. After wasting the best part of the first part of the morning, John went to investigate and found that the roof had been leaking and water had somehow been getting into the phonelines causing all manner of untold excitement over in the UK at Butler Sheetmetal Ltd.

It then took John until lunchtime to fix the soggy gremlin.

And the enquiries? Not a single one.

That’s more like the Tuesday mornings I know and love.